Christian Dating: Why they aren’t dating​ each other.

Christians today, are extremely preoccupied with the need to seek after God typifying God is playing Hide and Seek. Some other Christians have locked their chariots, running after God as if God was running away from them. There is another category of Christians who are engrossed in trying to climb up an imaginary ladder of spirituality to reach the upper echelon of spirituality. These three types of people are in your church, your friendship circle, your church band or your leadership group. Of course, everybody needs Jesus but what happened to ‘needing one another’?

Life necessitates survival and survival of mankind on earth rest on the interdependence nature the creator gifted to the humanity. Philosophy teaches us that the difference between God and humanity is the fact that God is a Necessary being, meaning God is independent, God does not need connection with the matter to exist, God is all-sufficient and human beings aren’t. we need each other to travel through this maze called life. The contingency of one being lies upon another being for its survival and ultimately ties to the Necessary being who is God. The point is, God has wired human beings in a way they need a companion to balance the journey through life. God being omnipotent knew what life was going to throw on us so God wires us in a way that we would need one another. After creating the first man God said:

It is not good that the man should be alone

the same implies for women; it’s not good for a woman to be alone.

However, some Christians today have rejected the interdependency of life by seeking to be more spiritual to please God, to protect their Christian images and proudly be esteemed above others who aren’t spiritual. A lot of Christians are striving to climb up a delusional ladder of spirituality to reach the upper echelon of spirituality assuming there is a prize for attaining a certain level of spirituality. They are manipulating their sacrifices to the cause of Christ, ministries and the church to reach a high level of spirituality. This attitude has made many Christians become arrogant and proud enough not to desire a relationship with someone. A lot of Christians have shattered their desires for relationships with someone because they are busy chasing after God, they have manufactured excuses to exonerate their ignorant attitudes toward those who desire relationships with them.

Spirituality has now become an armour lots of Christian Singles utilise to camouflage their inefficiencies and inadequacies, in other words, their imperfections. Some other Christian singles would use spirituality as a disguise to hide their needs. We live by the principle of girding our hearts from bad people but we are now even girding our hearts away from good people. We have blinded ourselves with Christian jargons and slogans such as ‘I am chasing after God’ or ‘Jesus is all I need’ and we are using these sayings to push away those who can potentially love us.

Some Christians are now hiding their feelings behind disguises by putting on righteousness facades to protect their church images, putting on fraudulent attitudes typifying wholeness and prideful look to disguise their needs and look sufficient enough not to share life with someone else. Those who have been part of the Christian life for a very long time would testify that there is no such a thing as a medal of spirituality. Our pure desire to seek after God should be rooted in the fact that we want to dwell in the presence of God and desire God to dwell in our midst. A Christian life is a cross, meaning we are to look up to God vertically and connect with others horizontally.

This arrogant attitude toward dating in Christian communities is killing a lot of single people; many are filled with frustrations and disappointments but they are hiding beneath their armours and behind their spiritual disguises. Some ask questions such as ‘why isn’t anyone dating me?’ or ‘why haven’t I dated anyone?’. The answer: one of the reasons why no one has dated you yet or you haven’t dated anyone is because you are too busy climbing up a delusional spiritual ladder to reach the upper echelon of spirituality. You have put on an ‘I don’t need anyone’ face on, an arrogant attitude to disparage others for the sake of pursuing holiness.
It is obvious to notice the delusion of grandeur in Christian communities and it is a dare to anthropomorphically exhaust the profundity of this behaviour in the Christian communities. But one thing we should be aware of is that this is a common behaviour in a Christian community and it’s not our metier to point fingers at others; one must consciously question their own attitude because arrogant people love pointing fingers at arrogant people. Arrogance will always cause you to miss opportunities; until you humble yourself enough and admit you have needs and desire companionship with someone then someone will walk into your life. Now get rid of that spiritual disguise you are hiding behind, get up, go talk to that one lady you’ve been wanting to speak to or if you are a lady then it’s about time you approach that man, yes him, he won’t think you are less spiritual, just do it.

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